Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Friday, July 12, 2024

I-position

 

Happy Families 2024 by
Geoffrey Sutton & Designer

In polygamy research, the term I-position refers to a woman's subjective experience and perspective within a polygamous marriage. It encompasses her feelings, thoughts, and role in the family structure. Researchers have explored how women's marital satisfaction, emotional well-being, and overall psychological impact are influenced by their position within a polygamous family.

Example

In their study of women living in polygynous marriages, Sinai and Peleg (2021) reported women's levels of marital satisfaction were positively related to their Iposition and fusion with others and negatively related to emotional cutoff and number of children at home, whereas among monogamous counterparts, marital satisfaction was only negatively associated with emotional cutoff.

Reference

Sinai, M., & Peleg, O. (2021). Marital interactions and experiences of women living in polygamy: An exploratory study. International Journal of Psychology56(3), 361–377. https://doi.org/10.1002/ijop.12726


Geoffrey W. Sutton, PhD is Emeritus Professor of Psychology. He retired from a clinical practice and was credentialed in clinical neuropsychology and psychopharmacology. His website is  www.suttong.com

 

See Geoffrey Sutton’s books on   AMAZON       or  GOOGLE STORE

Follow on    FACEBOOK   Geoff W. Sutton    

   X  @Geoff.W.Sutton    


You can read many published articles at no charge:

  Academia   Geoff W Sutton     ResearchGate   Geoffrey W Sutton 

 

Dr. Sutton’s posts are for educational purposes only. See a licensed mental health provider for diagnoses, treatment, and consultation. 


 

Tuesday, January 2, 2024

Psychology of Regret

 



Regret is a common unpleasant emotional response to a person’s memory of their response to an event or situation, which they wish had been different. A previous response may have been active or passive. That is, the person may regret a decision or an action or the failure to act. Regret is a multidimensional concept including emotion, cognition, and behavior in a social context and sometimes associated with health conditions. At our core, regret may influence our self-esteem, self-concept, and self-identity.

Assessing Regret

The assessment may lead to understanding the impact of regret and how to benefit from a regretted decision. These components of regret are the familiar psychological dimensions of functioning summarized in the  SCOPES model  where the six letters are an acrostic for six dimensions as seen below albeit in a different order.

Cognition- Regret involves thinking about the regretted action or inaction. Examples include a failure to invest or sell an investment, an action resulting in the loss of an important relationship or a missed opportunity to develop a relationship. Excessive thinking about the regret or rumination can result in considerable distress. Denial can interfere with accepting regret and moving forward.

Ignorance in the form of avoiding information about an upcoming event is a common way of dealing with the potential pain of regret. This phenomenon is referred to as anticipatory regret (see Gigernzer & Garcia-Retamero, 2017).

Emotion- Regret is an emotion accompanied by sadness and sorrow. Some stress inducing regrets lead to feelings of anger and anxiety. Strong emotions can be a catalyst for action.

Observable behavior-Regret may lead to avoidance of a person or situation in the future that is connected to the regret. Regret may also lead to engagement in a situation or relationship in order to avoid a regretted past mistake. In some cases, people may act to undo the effects of their past regretted actions. And some people may act in ways to overcompensate for their regrets, which can lead to burnout. These examples illustrate the influence regret can have on current behavior.

Physical-When regret leads to stress then there may be associated biological responses associated with stress such as headache, muscle tension, fatigue, impaired sleep, and so forth.

Social- Regrets often take place in a social context such as the common regret linked to effects on close relationships such as with romantic partners, parent-child relationships, and friendships.

Self- Regrets may affect components of our core sense of self such as our self-esteem, self-concept, and self-identity.

Managing Regret

Acceptance of regret may lead to releasing the sorrow and ending the associated re-thinking in order to focus on present decisions.

Practicing self-compassion can relieve the feelings of distress associated with regretted decisions. Self-compassion may include taking actions that you enjoy such as a mini-break from work, sitting in a hot tub, exercise, thinking of personal accomplishments, and replacing negative self-talk with positive statements.

Begin the process of self-forgiveness. When a past action resulted in physical or psychological harm then self-forgiveness may be an appropriate way to let go of the past and move forward.

Consult a psychotherapist. Sometimes, we may benefit from talking with someone who can guide us through the process of letting go of regrets.

Regret Theories

Scientists have studied regret and developed theories to describe the relationship among the variables that cause regret.

The Temporal Theory of Regret refers to the tendency to regret actions taken in the short term but regret inaction in the long term.

Decision Justification Theory suggests people regret choices that appear to lead to worse than expected outcomes.

The Belonging Theory of Regret is based on the tendency of people to regret actions that threaten their sense of belonging.

In behavioral economics, Regret Theory models choices under conditions of uncertainty and anticipated regret.

 Cite this post

Sutton, G. W. (2024, January 2). Psychology of regret. Psychology Concepts and Theories. Retrieved from https://suttonpsychology.blogspot.com/2024/01/psychology-of-regret.html

References

Gigerenzer, G., & Garcia-Retamero, R. (2017). Cassandra's regret: The psychology of not wanting to know. Psychological review124(2), 179–196. https://doi.org/10.1037/rev0000055

Loomes, G., & Sugden, R. (1982). Regret theory: An alternative theory of rational choice under uncertainty. Economic Journal, 92(368), 805-824.

Morrison, M., & Roese, N. J. (2011). Regrets of the typical American: Findings from a nationally representative sample. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 2(6), 576-583.

Roese, N. J., & Summerville, A. (2005). What we regret most... and why. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 31(9), 1273-1285.

 Sutton, G. W. (2024, January 2). Psychology of regret. Psychology Concepts and Theories. Retrieved from https://suttonpsychology.blogspot.com/2024/01/psychology-of-regret.html


Geoffrey W. Sutton, PhD is Emeritus Professor of Psychology. He retired from a clinical practice and was credentialed in clinical neuropsychology and psychopharmacology. His website is  www.suttong.com

 

See Geoffrey Sutton’s books on   AMAZON       or  GOOGLE STORE

Follow on    FACEBOOK   Geoff W. Sutton    

   TWITTER  @Geoff.W.Sutton    


You can read many published articles at no charge:

  Academia   Geoff W Sutton     ResearchGate   Geoffrey W Sutton 

 

Dr. Sutton’s posts are for educational purposes only. See a licensed mental health provider for diagnoses, treatment, and consultation.


Monday, January 2, 2023

Mindfulness in Psychology

Created by Geoffrey Sutton & Dall.e

Mindfulness is an intentional act to focus attention on the present without forming judgments. During mindfulness a person becomes more aware of their emotions and physical status.

Mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we're doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what's going on around us.
Mindfulness can be cultivated through formal meditation, but it can also be practiced in everyday activities, such as eating, walking, or working. When we practice mindfulness, we pay attention to our thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment without judgment. We simply observe what is happening, without trying to change it.

Mindfulness has been shown to have a number of benefits, including reducing stress, improving focus and concentration, and increasing self-awareness. It can also help us to cope with difficult emotions and to live more fully in the present moment.

Two Components of Mindfulness


Mindfulness strategies focus on the two components of attention and acceptance.
Attention is the focus on one's breathing, thinking, feelings, and physical sensations.
Acceptance is observing without judging that which has been observed during the attentional process. (APA, 2019)

Measuring Mindfulness
Use the links to read about scales that measure dimensions of mindfulness.


Some mindfulness strategies
Find a quiet place where you won't be disturbed.
Sit in a comfortable position with your back straight.
Close your eyes and focus on your breathing.
Notice the sensations of your breath as it enters and leaves your body.
If your mind wanders, gently bring it back to your breath.

Continue to focus on your breath for 5-10 minutes.


Mindfulness Interventions
Mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR)- Weekly sessions or classes that teach exercises.
Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT) - An addition of mindfulness techniques to cognitive-behavioral therapy.

Effects of Mindfulness

Representative effect sizes based on the largest number of studies were identified across a wide range of populations, problems, interventions, comparisons, and outcomes (PICOS). A total of 160 effect sizes were reported in 44 meta-analyses (k = 336 RCTs, N = 30,483 participants). MBIs showed superiority to passive controls across most PICOS (ds = 0.10–0.89). Effects were typically smaller and less often statistically significant compared with active controls. MBIs were similar or superior to specific active controls and evidence-based treatments. (Abstract, Goldberg et al., 2022)

Effect-size estimates suggested that MBT is moderately effective in pre-post comparisons (n = 72; Hedge's g = .55), in comparisons with waitlist controls (n = 67; Hedge's g = .53), and when compared with other active treatments (n = 68; Hedge's g = .33), including other psychological treatments (n = 35; Hedge's g = .22). MBT did not differ from traditional CBT or behavioral therapies (n = 9; Hedge's g = − .07) or pharmacological treatments (n = 3; Hedge's g = .13). (Abstract, Khoury et al., 2013)

Mindfulness and Relationships

Mindfulness in relationships involves a non-judgemental focusing on being together and includes an increased awareness of the other person and their needs.

Findings from this review suggest that higher levels of mindfulness, both dispositional and learned, are consistently correlated with greater relationship satisfaction. Research indicates a handful of specific mechanisms, seemingly fostered through mindfulness, that may account for the repeatedly demonstrated association between mindfulness and relationship enhancement. Proposed mechanisms that may explicate this connection are examined, including individual wellbeing, emotion skillfulness, enhancements in sexual satisfaction, increased empathy, and healthier stress responses. (Abstract, Kozlowski, 2013)

To summarize the heterogeneous quantitative literature regarding individual outcomes, mindfulness interventions for couples seem to increase mindfulness, self‐compassion, well‐being, and quality of life. Additionally, we found initial evidence of beneficial effects on relieving psychopathological symptoms and psychobiological stress measures. Measures of relationship quality were the predominant dyadic outcome. (Abstract, Winter et al., 2021)

Sexual mindfulness
Sexual mindfulness is being fully present and aware of oneself and one's partner in the moment of sexual intimacy.

Defined as present-moment, non-judgmental awareness, mindfulness skills have been incorporated into both individual and group treatment programs and found to be effective for significantly improving several domains of sexual response and decreasing sex-related distress. (Abstract, Brotto, 2013)

Mindfulness and behavioral addictions


"Results suggest that mindfulness-based interventions are effective in reducing mental distress and craving reactions. Reductions in craving levels were reported in four of six studies with biggest effects for mindfulness-based cognitive therapy and mindfulness-enhanced cognitive behavioral therapy. Successful reductions in mental distress were identified in five of seven studies that used diverse mindfulness-based techniques. However, no more than one study on mindfulness-based interventions reporting improvements in self-control, inhibitory control, maladaptive decision-making, and cognitive biases could be identified. (Abstract, Brandtner et al., 2022)

Mindfulness and Christianity

The current study incorporated explicitly religious constructs to create a Christian accommodative mindfulness (CAM) protocol that was used with a small group of Christian psychotherapy clients seeking treatment for symptoms of depression or anxiety. Shame, which is often at the root of many psychological and spiritual health conditions, was also measured as were a variety of resiliency factors to determine the effectiveness of the CAM protocol in a real-world, clinical setting. Results from this N-of-1 time-series study using five subjects revealed significant effect sizes (more than half of the total individual effect sizes measured were found to be 'very effective') that associate CAM with decreased depression, anxiety, and shame and increased resiliency measures in the sample. (Abstract, Jones et al., 2021)

References
American Psychological Association. (2019, October 30). Mindfulness meditation: A research-proven way to reduce stress. https://www.apa.org/topics/mindfulness/meditation

Brandtner, A., Antons, S., King, D. L., Potenza, M. N., Tang, Y.-Y., Blycker, G. R., Brand, M., & Liebherr, M. (2022). A preregistered, systematic review considering mindfulness-based interventions and neurofeedback for targeting affective and cognitive processes in behavioral addictions. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 29(4), 379–392. https://doi.org/10.1037/cps0000075

Brotto, L. A. (2013). Mindful sex. Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 22(2), 63–68. https://doi.org/10.3138/cjhs.2013.2132

Goldberg, S. B., Riordan, K. M., Sun, S., & Davidson, R. J. (2022). The empirical status of mindfulness-based interventions: A systematic review of 44 meta-analyses of randomized controlled trials. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 17(1), 108–130. https://doi.org/10.1177/1745691620968771

Jones, T. L., Garzon, F. L., & Ford, K. M. (2021). Christian accommodative mindfulness in the clinical treatment of shame, depression, and anxiety: Results of an N-of-1 time-series study. Spirituality in Clinical Practice. https://doi.org/10.1037/scp0000221

Khoury, B., Lecomte, T., Fortin, G., Masse, M., Therien, P., Bouchard, V., Chapleau, M. A., Paquin, K., & Hofmann, S. G. (2013). Mindfulness-based therapy: a comprehensive meta-analysis. Clinical psychology review, 33(6), 763–771. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2013.05.005

Kozlowski, A. (2013). Mindful mating: Exploring the connection between mindfulness and relationship satisfaction. Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 28(1–2), 92–104. https://doi.org/10.1080/14681994.2012.748889

Winter, F., Steffan, A., Warth, M., Ditzen, B., & Aguilar, R. C. (2021). Mindfulness‐based couple interventions: A systematic literature review. Family Process. https://doi.org/10.1111/famp.12683


Geoffrey W. Sutton, PhD is Emeritus Professor of Psychology. He retired from a clinical practice and was credentialed in clinical neuropsychology and psychopharmacology. His website is  www.suttong.com

 

See Geoffrey Sutton’s books on   AMAZON       or  GOOGLE STORE

Follow on    FACEBOOK   Geoff W. Sutton    

   TWITTER  @Geoff.W.Sutton    

You can read many published articles at no charge:

  Academia   Geoff W Sutton     ResearchGate   Geoffrey W Sutton 

 

Dr. Sutton’s posts are for educational purposes only. See a licensed mental health provider for diagnoses, treatment, and consultation.

Learn about research using surveys 





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Monday, April 4, 2022

breadcrumbing

 



In psychology, breadcrumbing is a behavior pattern of one partner in a relationship contributing only minimal amounts of time, attention, energy, affection, and encouragement to the other partner. The partner who receives the limited supply of "breadcrumbs" is left feeling the relationship isn't satisfying despite the small acts of kindness.

Breadcrumbing can be a matter of degree. In the worst cases, the relationship can feel emotionally abusive when actions often fail to match words and plans fail to materialize.

Healthy responding requires understanding one's personal needs and ensuring that one is treated respectfully, setting boundaries on the limits of what treatment you will and will not accept, and being careful not to devalue yourself based on the way you are treated.




Please check out my website   www.suttong.com

   and see my books on   AMAZON       or  GOOGLE STORE

Also, consider connecting with me on    FACEBOOK   Geoff W. Sutton    

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You can read many published articles at no charge:

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Saturday, February 12, 2022

Five Love Languages Model

 


The Five Love Languages model was developed by Gary Chapman. Based on his clinical work, Chapman hypothesized that partners in relationships communicate love in different preferred ways and anticipate different expressions of love.

Based on his observations, he identified five expressions of love. The idea is that one or two of these “love languages” or expressions are more preferred than the other expressions. And each partner may have a different order of preferences.

Words of Affirmation (e.g., words of appreciation and affirmation; express kindness)

Quality Time (e.g., focused attention without interruption and without giving advice)

Receiving Gifts (giving gifts, which need not be expensive; the gift of time during a crisis)

Acts of Service (e.g., completing tasks for them)

Physical Touch (e.g., sexual and nonsexual)

These five expressions have been operationalized in a 30-item scale, which is called a quiz in online presentations.

Psychotherapists and lay people have found the measure and the theory useful. Several books offer suggestions on how the five love languages work for individuals and couples.

A Critique of Five Love Languages

Researchers Impett, Park, and Muise examined evaluated the Love Languages concept (2024). One reason for the investigation was the limited scientific evidence supporting Love Languages. In Table 1 of their analysis, the authors provide evidence that does not support three core assumptions.

A Few Examples

1. Instead of having a primary love language, people gave high ratings to all of the love languages.

2. Analyses do not find consistent results for a five-factor structure.

3. High relationship satisfaction does not appear restricted to a love language match. Relationship satisfaction may be associated with all expressions of love.

The authors suggest a different metaphor in their abstract:

We offer an alternative metaphor that we believe more accurately reflects a large body of empirical research on relationships: Love is not akin to a language one needs to learn to speak but can be more appropriately understood as a balanced diet in which people need a full range of essential nutrients to cultivate lasting love. Impett et al., 2024

 

See Impett et al. (2024) for the evidence supporting their findings.


The concept of love fits in the E dimension of the SCOPES model. Thoughts about love and behavioral expressions fit in the C and O dimensions and reflect the common cognitive-affective-behavioral approach to human functioning. There are of course two important contextual basis for understanding love. The biological component of love is reflected in the P dimension and the relationship context in the S dimension. Finally, The S for the core Self is vital to understand how a person integrated their loving experience as part of their self-identity and self-esteem.

References

Bland, A. M., & McQueen, K. S. (2018). The distribution of Chapman’s love languages in couples: An exploratory cluster analysis. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice7(2), 103–126. https://doi.org/10.1037/cfp0000102

Chapman, G. (2015). The 5 love languages. Chicago: Northfield.

Impett, E. A., Park, H. G., & Muise, A. (2024). Popular psychology through a scientific lens: Evaluating Love Languages from a relationship science perspective. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 0(0). https://doi.org/10.1177/09637214231217663

 Key words:  love, emotion, relationships

Note

Thanks to Richard Sima for his AP article (January 15, 2024) citing the work of Impett and her team.

Related posts

Five Love Languages Test

Sternberg’s Triangular Love Scale

 

One of Chapman's popular books- The Five Love Languages



 Please check out my website   www.suttong.com

   and see my books on   AMAZON       or  GOOGLE STORE

Also, consider connecting with me on    FACEBOOK   Geoff W. Sutton    

   TWITTER  @Geoff.W.Sutton    

You can read many published articles at no charge:

  Academia   Geoff W Sutton     ResearchGate   Geoffrey W Sutton 

 

 

Friday, June 25, 2021

Polygamy Polygyny Polyandry

 



Polygamy in the generic term for people who have multiple marriages. 

The most common form of polygamy is polygyny--one man has two or more wives. 

Polyandry is the form of polygamy in which a woman is married to two or more men.

Bigamy refers to a person being married to two people.

Polygamy is rare but more common in some parts of the world than others.

In many countries, polygamy is illegal but some people living in polygamous relationships may have multiple marriages in accordance with their religion. Polygamy is an acceptable form of marriage for Muslims and some Christian sects.

Research on polygamy is ongoing. Many nations ban polygamy but some tolerate polygamy among cultural groups that have a long tradition of polygamy.

Researchers have documented higher rates of physical abuse and emotional distress among wives in polygynous relationships compared to women in monogamous relationships. However, some wives in polygynous relationships report benefits like shared household responsibilities and parenting tasks.

Following are some references that might be helpful. The reference section of the articles may lead you to other pertinent studies.

References

Agadjanian V. (2020). Condemned and Condoned: Polygynous Marriage in Christian Africa. Journal of marriage and the family82(2), 751–768. https://doi.org/10.1111/jomf.12624

Alhuzail, N. A. (2023). “I wish he were dead” The experience of loss among young Arab-Bedouin women in polygamous families. Affilia: Feminist Inquiry in Social Work38(1), 75–90. https://doi.org/10.1177/08861099221075899

Anderson, C. M. (2000). The persistence of polygyny as an adaptive response to poverty and oppression in apartheid South Africa. Cross-Cultural Research: The Journal of Comparative Social Science34(2), 99–112. https://doi.org/10.1177/106939710003400201

Dierickx, S., Rahbari, L., Longman, C., Jaiteh, F., & Coene, G. (2018). 'I am always crying on the inside': a qualitative study on the implications of infertility on women's lives in urban Gambia. Reproductive health15(1), 151. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12978-018-0596-2

Gwanfogbe, P. N., Schumm, W. R., Smith, M., & Furrow, J. L. (1997). Polygyny and Marital Life Satisfaction: an Exploratory Study from Rural Cameroon. Journal of Comparative Family Studies, 28, 55-71.

Hassouneh-Phillips, D. (2001). Polygamy and wife abuse: A qualitative study of Muslim women in America. Health Care for Women International22(8), 735–748. https://doi.org/10.1080/073993301753339951

Lawson, D. W., James, S., Ngadaya, E., Ngowi, B., Mfinanga, S. G. M., & Mulder, M. B. (2015). No evidence that polygynous marriage is a harmful cultural practice in northern Tanzania. PNAS Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America112(45), 13827–13832. https://doi.org/10.1073/pnas.1507151112

Masoga, M. A., & Shokane, A. L. (2016). Women in polygynous marriages and African Initiated Churches: Selected narratives in Greater Tzaneen, South Africa. Agenda30(3), 80–90. https://doi.org/10.1080/10130950.2016.1259868

Shepard, L. D. (2013). The impact of polygamy on women’s mental health: A systematic review. Epidemiology and Psychiatric Sciences22(1), 47–62. https://doi.org/10.1017/S2045796012000121

Tabi, M. M., Doster, C., & Cheney, T. (2010). A qualitative study of women in polygynous marriages. International nursing review57(1), 121–127. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1466-7657.2009.00762.x

Note

The earliest biblical reference to polygyny is in Genesis 4, which refers to the two wives of Lamech.


Geoffrey W. Sutton, PhD is Emeritus Professor of Psychology. He retired from a clinical practice and was credentialed in clinical neuropsychology and psychopharmacology. His website is  www.suttong.com

 

See Geoffrey Sutton’s books on   AMAZON       or  GOOGLE STORE

Follow on    FACEBOOK   Geoff W. Sutton    

   X  @Geoff.W.Sutton    


You can read many published articles at no charge:

  Academia   Geoff W Sutton     ResearchGate   Geoffrey W Sutton 

 

Dr. Sutton’s posts are for educational purposes only. See a licensed mental health provider for diagnoses, treatment, and consultation. 







Polyamory


Polyamory is a multiperson romantic relationship among adults, which usually includes sexual relations. 

Polyamorous relationships are based on consent.

Polyamory differs from polygamy because polygamy includes multiple marriages.

Moors et al. (2021) reported on findings from a national sample in the United States.

Results show that 1 out of 6 people (16.8%) desire to engage in polyamory, and 1 out of 9 people (10.7%) have engaged in polyamory at some point during their life. Approximately 1 out of 15 people (6.5%) reported that they knew someone who has been or is currently engaged in polyamory. Among participants who were not personally interested in polyamory, 1 out of 7 (14.2%) indicated that they respect people who engage in polyamory.


Reference

Moors AC, Gesselman AN and Garcia JR (2021) Desire, Familiarity, and Engagement in Polyamory: Results From a National Sample of Single Adults in the United States. Frontiers in Psychology, 12:619640. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2021.619640




Photo credit- Bing "free to share and use"


Tuesday, February 16, 2021

Microfriendships



Microfriendships are brief friendly interactions with others characterized by kindness and resulting in happy feelings. Examples include pleasant conversations with a stranger in a subway, a taxi driver, a store clerk, or restaurant waitstaff.

Learn more in an essay on this topic by David Myers "The Happy Science of Micro-Friendships."

Please check out my website   www.suttong.com

   and see my books on   AMAZON       or  GOOGLE STORE

Also, consider connecting with me on    FACEBOOK   Geoff W. Sutton    

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You can read many published articles at no charge:

  Academia   Geoff W Sutton     ResearchGate   Geoffrey W Sutton 

Saturday, December 12, 2020

Psychology of Contempt

 


Contempt is an emotion and a disposition. Contempt destroys relationships.

Contempt is an emotion associated with feeling morally superior to another person. Contempt may be accompanied by mild anger. The people expressing contempt appears to see themselves as more powerful and of a higher status than the target of contempt.

Contempt may be upward and downward. That is, a person of lower social rank may feel upward contempt toward social superiors like authority figures or work supervisors. And people of higher social rank may feel downward contempt toward those viewed as of lower social rank like a professor toward a person of limited education or an experienced clinician toward a novice.

The work of Paul Ekman identified a facial expression of contempt as the corner of one side of a lip raised—a unilateral facial expression. The voice tone of contempt is perceived as smug and disapproving.

Contempt can have posture too—a move toward being physically upright as if to “look down one’s nose.” Eye-rolling is another sign of contempt.

As a psychotherapist, the work of John Gottman and his colleagues (e.g., Gottman & Silver, 1999) had a powerful effect on my appreciation for contempt, which is an emotion-driven attitude that can destroy a marriage.

Gottman and Silver illustrate contempt in a couple’s relationship. One partner routinely criticizes the other. The second person responds with a sneer and sarcasm when the critic makes a suggestion. The sarcasm turns to cynicism—both words reveal contempt. The authors add other indicators of contempt: “name-calling, eye-rolling, mockery, and hostile humor (Kindle location 1254).”

Contempt is related to disgust psychology but it is not the same. In both cases, a social distance occurs but disgust may be linked to feeling revulsion about something considered unclean, yucky, or sickening whereas, people feeling contempt may feel good. 

Contempt in a relationship conveys disgust and leads to more conflict, which prevents reconciliation. Contempt develops from a long history of negative thoughts toward the other in a relationship and can lead to a closely related pattern of belligerence, which is an expression of anger in an aggressive manner. Belligerence is manifest as a threat or provocation. In common language, contempt is the poison in toxic relationships.

In their article about dispositional contempt, Roberta Shriber at UC-Davis and her colleagues refer to the concept as “the tendency to look down on, distance, and derogate others who violate our standards (2017, p. 280).” These authors want to move the study of contempt from a look at the emotional components of which disgust is paramount, to a personality trait. Features of the disposition include a pattern of viewing select others as incompetent, inferior, and to be avoided. Shriber and others build on the data for contempt as a disposition based on its durability in the work of John Gottman and his colleagues.

In Christianity, the Apostle Paul warned people in the Roman church against a contemptuous attitude toward people who held different convictions (See chapter 14).

In philosophy, contempt may be discussed as an example of a judgmental emotion. See the entry "emotion" in the SEP.


For a measure of contempt, see the Dispositional Contempt Scale

Read more about the problem of contempt in relationships: Principles of Healthy Marriages

Resources

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by Gottman & Silver

Unmasking the Face by Ekman & Friesen

The Righteous Mind by Haidt

Topics: #contempt #disgust #moralpsychology #righteousmind

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References

Gottman, J. & Silver, N. (1999). The seven principles for making marriage work. New York: Three Rivers.

Schriber, R. A., Chung, J. M., Sorensen, K. S., & Robins, R. W. (2017). Dispositional contempt: A first look at the contemptuous person. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 113, 280-309.